Zion Nat'l Park, Columbine

…”A pair of my old pants to fly as a flag over your home office”…

A client shared with me an amazing and exciting bit of information that clearly validates his commitment to and the benefit of the optimal life management program in which he and I are engaged.

We’ve been working together for nearly six months in this small-step behavior change program. He has made spectacular progress in regards to slowly shifting his relationship with food, his feelings about and commitment to physical activity, and his awareness of the gifts of gratitude, mindfulness and intentional quieting of his mind.

We share a weekly Skype session and several emails during the week. After each weekly session, I type up a summary of our session that captures our shared dialogue. The content of the summary reviews the week’s small-step successes and any barriers or challenges that may have arisen. We discuss the coping mechanisms he utilized to manage the challenges, and explore additional choices that are available to him. My summary includes direct quotes from him that exemplify his sense of progress and forward movement.

The milestone he shared was that in preparation for a business luncheon, his wife commented that his slacks were too baggy and loose for him to wear. He went into the garage to find a box of “old” clothes that he had not worn in many years. Much to his delight, he was able to comfortably fit into a pair of pants that were 4 sizes smaller than the baggy pants that he was currently wearing. That’s a lot of sizes to drop! And all because he is integrating 5 small meals per day, moving his body—gently, on a regular basis, and engaging in self-soothing relaxation sessions. How wonderful!

Last week, at the end of our Skype session, I asked him if he would send me a summary of our session. What he sent literally had me laughing out loud. With his permission, and with slight modifications to maintain his anonymity, I submit this to you now for your reading pleasure!


Of course I took no notes, and a day has gone by, so I’ll summarize from memory.

  1. You wanted a pair of my old pants to fly as a flag over your home office, and maybe use on your web site.
  2. You said I should eat more stuff that I don’t like.
  3. I’m supposed to get to the next level by exercising more and eating less. Although no hard numbers were agreed upon, I’m left with the impression that five or six hours a day of varied exercise would tilt me in the right direction.
  4. You have a formula for mixing yogurt and dried leaves that will destroy the taste of actual vegetables.
  5. I should get an account at Whole Foods and eat everything they chop up.
  6. You hinted that I look good in baggy shirts.
  7. You miss not having a record of everything I eat.
  8. You made clear how you feel about hot dogs, to the extent you’re crazy if you think I’ll ever invite you to a baseball game.
  9. I may help you get to Cleveland, but I’ll never tell you where I live.
Robin Mallery

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“Robin’s continual encouragement to pick a quit-smoking date inspired me to finally do it. She gave me the tools and strategies I needed to become a successful non-smoker!”
—Kathy D., client

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